This past week has been a week of remembrance.
So many of us have been reminded of people and things this week that have touched our lives and our souls, and likely will for years to come.
In the news, we were reminded of the senseless and tragic loss of Reagan and Braxlynn Hancock. That horrible day will forever live in my memories and no doubt yours as well.
It was simply, to me, a day that should never have happened.
This week we also paused to remember Veterans Day and all of those who fought and served our country in the military, and those who do even today. We owe them all so much. If you are like me, you know we need so much more than just one day to remember and honor them. It should be something we do every single day.
And then we have remembered the lives of three little girls who died five years ago this past Saturday on a dark, lonely curve out by Chili Flats.
I know how old they were. You might find it odd that I refer to them as little girls, but make no mistake, to their mamas and daddies, they will always be their little girls. If you talk to them, it is unmistakably obvious that they will each always be remembered for being their little girls.
Megan Daniel, Ashlin Cox and Katie Jo Vaughn were three young ladies that were on the cusp of adulthood, and each were on a path to make their mark on this world. To me, their passing made the world just a little bit darker, a little bit sadder, a little more…empty.
I have spent many hours out at that curve in the road since that November 8 night five years ago. I have spent time at the cemetery where Megan and Katie Jo rest. People have questioned why I do that. I have often struggled with the answer to that question.
Last week I drove to Dallas to see my mom, my wife Patty’s mom. She was my mom before she was my mother-in-law. (Ask me sometime and I will explain) I went because God told me to. If you know me at all you know what it means for me to have driven all the way to Dallas by myself. But I went because I needed answers and I knew mom would have them. She always does, whether I like the answers or not.
In my time with her Friday, she said exactly what I needed to hear and what God wanted me to hear.
Then Sunday morning, as I sat and listened to Pastor James Sparks preach, he confirmed what mom had said in a way that can only be God.
Pastor Sparks spoke at the end of his message about “beauty from ashes.” He spoke about how God can take the very worst tragedies, the very worst times in our lives, and even our very worst sins, and make them something beautiful.
As he spoke about the tragedy at Albert Pike in 2010 and the resulting beauty in the ministry of Nick’s Mission, the words of my mom on Friday flooded back in. Losing my wife Patty in 2018 was absolutely the worst thing I have ever had to live through. Much like Reagan Hancock’s family, the Shumake family, and the families of Megan, Katie Jo and Ashlin, I can’t imagine anything worse happening to me. My kids would agree.
But here is what God says.
We all do have pages of our stories that we wish we didn’t have to be read and we all experience days that we wish never happened. But He does and can bring beauty from ashes. He can take the hard things and use us to turn it into something life changing.
Beauty from ashes.
The lives of all of those I have talked about above continue to impact lives today, years past their leaving this world. As the life and memory of Nick fosters a ministry that touches thousands of lives, the memories and lives of Reagan, Ashlin, Katie Jo and Megan continue to touch our world today. Good things, beautiful, life changing things have been brought into the world in their name. More will come.
For me, the beauty from the ashes lies in the indelible print Patty made on my heart, my life. I now live my life in the pursuit of living more like her, more like Jesus. It is my hope that one day my memory will have just a touch of the impact that Nick, Reagan, Ashlin, Megan, Katie Jo, and Patty had on the world.
The key to that is letting go of the day, the tragedy and the loss and moving forward focusing more on the memory, the impact…the beauty.
I pray that we all can do that.
