Guys- Let’s Talk About Sext

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Publisher’s Note*  Sexting has become a worldwide issue and Northeast Texas is not immune to the problem. This four part series, written by a local young adult, seeks to address the issue on a personal level.
Tyler Pickle is a DeKalb High graduate currently attending Texas A&M. He is  a video journalist for 12th Man Productions, the middle man between the athletic department and ESPN, specializing in softball. Pickle is a Sport Management major with a double minor in journalism and communications. He has previously written for Odyssey, the largest website with articles written exclusively by students. 

By Tyler Pickle

Special to the Tribune

In the third part of this series, and the most difficult for me personally to write, I’m going to focus on the young men of our society. Guys, we’ve really dropped the ball on this. We have screwed up, myself included as much as anyone. As men, we are supposed to respect women, provide for women, and protect women. Lately, we have viewed women as warm bodies, have been lazy, and have hurt our women. When it comes to respecting women, it begins at the moment you first see a girl – what do you see? More times than not, men immediately see a sexual partner – not a potential girlfriend, friend, or even just a person. This is a societal issue that must be fixed immediately. Rather than play ‘the game’ and trying to swoon every girl we meet, what would it take for us to simply get to know a girl with no alternative motive? By doing this, we are dehumanizing the women in our lives and taking all emotion out of the situation. Due to this, it means absolutely nothing when we ask a girl to take off her clothes for us – it’s just another body, what does it matter? Until we start viewing our women as women again, we’re going to be stuck in this rut of experiencing only artificial love. When it comes to ‘providing’ for a woman, it is much more than financial. As men, we should provide our women with opportunities to grow as a woman and as a person. We should provide our women with comfort. We should provide our women the relationships they deserve. By creating toxic situations and not respecting them and their bodies, we are stripping them of these very necessities. Every time you ask your girlfriend to send you a provocative photo that she doesn’t want to, you steal a little bit away from her. Provide for your girlfriend the life you wish to one day be provided to your daughter.  Most important in this situation, however, is protecting our women. By allowing a girl to trust you, you sign up for everything that that entails. If a girl trusts you enough to share with you everything that she has, and you betray that trust, you are not a man. The lasting toll that a broken heart and embarrassment can have on a person is indescribable. If you take the responsibility of being a man and court a woman, do not be an immature boy. If you aren’t ready for that responsibly – and not everyone is – don’t you dare break a girl’s heart. This concept isn’t hard – be decent human beings. Anyone that would purposely destroy a woman’s life, even if just temporarily in high school, does not deserve an ounce of respect and needs to grow up. I judge myself harder than I could ever even think about judging someone else, so don’t be offended by me saying that, but please listen to me. No one is a lost cause, but if you have a problem, fix it. Don’t accept what society tells you that you should be like and take responsibility for your mistakes. 
 To everyone else, please don’t view our young men as bad people. As a young man in this society, I will be the first to tell you it is hard to navigate life as a teenager in 2017. We are constantly bombarded with pressures and messages and emotions and, more than anything, opportunities to screw up. We are facing issues that no generation before us has had to. Do not accept excuses, but have compassion. Instead of scolding a young man for screwing up and giving into immature temptations, build him back up in the right way. When I say that, I’m talking to every single person, young or old. Guys, you will screw up. That is a part of life. If you let it destroy you, it is all for nothing. If you build from it, it can be everything. Build.

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